Waiting, patience, and trusting.

Waiting......ever been there? Probably a stupid question. We have all been there. Seems to be the place I find myself right now; waiting on a lot of things. This can be a place where our faith is tested. God seems to make people wait in the Bible to trust in him. Countless times in Psalms is says "Wait on the Lord." In Exodus God used waiting on Him as a test for the Israelites. They didn't do so well. It seems to be so much against our human nature to trust and wait on God; to have full reliance on him. If you are like me you like to take things into your own hands when things don't seem to be going the way you had planned. This is the case with Saul in Samuel chapter 13. You should go read it but for right now I will paraphrase the story. Chapter 13 takes place after Saul has been appointed king over Israel (the people) because they so badly wanted a king over them rather than letting God be their king. God gives them what they want and Saul is appointed king. Well in chapter 13 the Philistines are getting ready to fight with Israel. The Israelites are intimidated by the size and power of the Philistine army so they begin to flee and hide any place they can. Saul being their leader sees what is going on and knows that Samuel will be there soon to give a sacrifice to God and ask Him for deliverance and victory over the Philistines. When Samuel doesn't show up when he said he would (or when Saul thought he should) Saul takes things into his own hands and decides to make the sacrifice to God himself. BIG MISTAKE!! God had made it clear in the law (Exodus, Deut. and Lev.), that only the priests were suppose to do such a thing. Ironically, Samuel comes right after Saul completes the burnt offering. Samuel of course is very upset and explains to him that his kingdom will not continue because he disobeyed God.
I have to say that I can really identify with Saul. There have been so many times in my life when I was waiting as Saul was and I would start to get fearful about what would happen right now. Rather than waiting on God for his appointed time I felt I needed to take things into my own hands. I have realized that when I don't wait on God then I don't get to experience His power, and provision. I can miss out on seeing God work in wonderful ways.
Why is it so hard to trust in God? Why can't I just rest in His timing and purpose? Guess I am a fearful control freak. The great thing about this all is that God in his grace lets me live to see the next chapter in my life where my faith grows and I can see that I need to trust rather than fear. Where I need to rest in his timing and not what I think should be happening on my time table. Right now I have a peace about the waiting. I am trying to rest in God and not in myself, my emotions, or my circumstances. In God's infinite grace I am realizing that waiting is not such a bad place to be. I really used to always say I hated waiting but this time I am learning that it is a great place to be. Relying on God for everything and trusting in the unseen.
It sure is hard to learn from our mistakes but it can be such a sweet thing how God continues to give us grace as we grow and continue to trust Him in the waiting and walking by faith.