In our Bible study we have been reading the book "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper. It ia pretty popular book in the Christian community and it is going well with what God is teaching me right now. Here is what the beginning of chapter 5 says,
If our single, and-all embracing passion is to make much of Christ in life and death, and if the life that magnifies him most is the life of costly love, then life is risk, and risk is right. To run from it is to waste your life.
John Piper further goes on to say that "risk is an action that exposes you to the possibility of loss or injury."
I am reminded daily that the life I live is risk. Really everyone's is. You could get in your car and get in an accident and die. You could have a heart attack right here and now. Life is a risk. Currently I am reminded that what we are doing with this adoption is a risk. Anyone who knows my husband and I know that we are risk takers. We often do not do things that are practical, and get rude remarks from all kinds of people even Christians. Throughout scripture there are not many prophets, and followers of God that were practical and didn't take risks. They all took risks. Why? For 2 reasons: 1) They wanted to obey God (Jesus says if we love God we will follow his commandments). 2)Because God gets the glory when things don't make any sense but we step out in faith. This is seen throughout the Bible too. Look at Elijah, Jonah, Abraham, all the prophets, and all the disciples. The hardest part of taking a risk for God is the question, "What if He doesn't pull through for me?" Which really means, "What if God doesn't do what I want him to do, or the outcome is not what I expected." I am haunted by the idea that we will not raise enough money in 2 weeks and not be able to get this baby boy. But God reminds me that sometimes His ways are not our ways. Sometimes he uses the broken road to lead you where HE wanted.
What about John the Baptist? Didn't really turn out so well for him. He got his head cut off because he lived for Christ and so did most of the disciples. I realize that is a little extreme and me stepping out in faith to adopt another child is not life threatening but for me it is hard, and I have to swallow a lot of pride, and deny my people pleasing tendencies (Gal. 1:10, 1 Thess. 2:4).
I do not have all the answers, but I know this. God has asked us to minister to the least of these and although it is hard, and involves a lot of risks, questions, uncertainty, and faith. I know that He has a plan for it all and I have many stones of remembrance to believe that He has something great for our future with adoption and so much more. Any of you who know how we got Malachi know this, and I am trusting and holding on to the fact that this particular baby we are looking at now, might not be the one, but that God knows what child is to be ours and I know He will do great things.
All that to say (sorry I am long winded) thank you for your prayers, because they have helped me in believing, and not getting discouraged! I love you all for supporting us, even if it doesn't make sense to you!!