Because of the requests of many people I am grudgingly posting a "belly" picture (almost 30 weeks pregnant). Luckily it goes with something God has been teaching me. :) Over the last 2 weeks we have had many discussions about where we are going to deliver the baby. The discussion doesn't come easily because there are no great medical facilities in Kotido like there are in the US. Being American we are used to having conveniences like great doctors, hospitals, paved roads and emergency assistance (and a working vehicle). In the absence of such conveniences and the controlled environment, I have found my mind worrying about having the baby here and playing the "what if's" in my head.
God used the Israelites in Exodus 1-16 to remind me of His faith.
God showed many signs and wonders to deliver the Israelites from Egypt and to show His power,(just as God has done some incredible things in my life). At the end of chapter 14 in verse 31 after God parts the Rea Sea and destroys the Egyptians "Israel saw the great power that the Lord used against the Egyptians, so the people feared the Lord, and they believed in the Lord and in His servant Moses." When I read this I thought to myself, "Really? God had placed all kinds of plagues on the Egyptians but spared the Israelites to show his power and only after He parts the Red Sea do they believe?"
In chapter 15 they sing praises to God for His deliverance.
3 days later they start grumbling and suddenly that belief and the miraculous signs God had done is not enough for them to believe He has a plan and a purpose. Israel hardens their hearts and they do not trust in God. This theme continues throughout Exodus. God provides and the Israelites find themselves needing God for something but each time they have their doubts and harden their hearts.
Reading this helps me remember the things that God told us before we came, and to remember the things God has done in the past. We were pregnant before we left the States and felt God told us that He is in control no matter what happened we could depend on Him. That is the theme throughout the Bible. He has always been faithful even in our times of trials and uncertainty.
The Israelites had gone 3 days without water and they were starting to lose hope and wonder where God was. When the price gets too high (we have too much to lose) then it becomes more difficult to hold onto our faith. We start to believe that this time may be different. All the "what if's" start to get bigger and bigger and we can then tend to forget everything God has done for us in the past and what He said He would do in the future, and we can talk ourselves out of believing in God. That doesn't mean suffering will never happen because we know that God uses suffering for a purpose (1 Peter, James 1:2, Jesus' example, hall of faith in Hebrews 11, etc).
This time I am going to hold onto what God has said. I am going to stop my mind before getting to the "what if's". I am going to grab on to scripture and watch Him work things out because I know He can be trusted. I will rest in His sovereignty and it is a great place to be.